Lyrics: It Will Not Chime Again
Love songs are where we get our passion, our soul — and almost of our worst ideas.
Nothing skillful tin come of this. Photograph past Achim Voss/Flickr.
Throughout human history, oceans have been crossed, mountains have been scaled, and great families take blossomed — all considering of a few simple chords and a melody that inflamed a heart and propelled information technology on a noble, romantic mission.
On the other paw, that time y'all told that girl yous just started seeing that you would "take hold of a grenade" for her? You did that considering of a love song. And information technology wasn't exactly a coincidence that she of a sudden decided to "lose your number" and move dorsum to Milwaukee to "figure some stuff out."
"It'due south only, my mom. You know? And Fifty.A. is so hot in the summer. And yep, my mom." Photo via iStock.
That time you held that boom box over your caput outside your ex's business firm? You did that because of a love song. And 50 hours of community service later, you're even so non back together.
Dear songs are great. They make our hearts beat faster. They inspire us to have risks and put our feelings on the line. And they give us terrible, terrible ideas about how actual, real-life human relationships should work.
They're amazing. So amazing. And also terrible.
Here are six love songs that sound romantic just aren't, and one vocal that doesn't audio romantic but totally is:
1. "God Only Knows," by The Beach Boys
You tin can continue your "Surfin' Safaris," your "I Get Arounds," and your "Help me Rhondas."
When it comes to The Beach Boys, "God Only Knows" is where information technology'southward at. A lush garden of soft horns and breezy melody. A tie-dye swirl of sound. A mural of haunted innocence with some of the most heartrending lyrics e'er committed to the dorsum of a surfboard.
Youth! Youth! Youth! Photograph by Hulton Archive/Getty Images.
Here's why information technology sounds romantic:
I may not always dear you
Only long every bit there are stars in a higher place you
You never need to dubiousness it
I'll make y'all and then certain about it
God only knows what I'd exist without you
If you lot're traipsing through a meadow in a sundress with your beloved and non playing "God Only Knows" on your iPod, you should really stop and starting time over.
If you lot're lazily bumping a beach brawl over a volleyball net and "God But Knows" isn't playing somewhere in the back of your listen, y'all demand to rethink the choices that got you to this indicate.
If you lot're a video editor compiling footage of grainy hippies frolicking in the mud and you're not underscoring it with the opening chords of "God Simply Knows," you are doing it wrong.
Hippies, likely on their way to a mud frolic. Photo by Colin Davey/Getty Images.
It'south a song that just feels like love. Pure love. Immature dear. Love with a chill, kelp-y vibe.
What could exist incorrect with that?
Here's why it'due south actually really, actually unromantic:
There's zero incorrect with loving someone. Sending them flowers. Leaving over-the-top notes in their P.O. boxes. Stroking their hair every bit they autumn comatose while you whisper the complete works of Nicholas Sparks into their ear.
"Miles Ryan stood on the dorsum porch of his firm, smoking a cigarette..." Photo past hatchettebookgroup.biz.
Just in that location is such a affair every bit loving someone a skosh too much.
If you lot should ever leave me
Though life would still proceed believe me
The world could show nothing to me
Then what skillful would living do me?
Look, I get it. Breakups suck. There'southward no getting around that. Simply good God.
At that place's a huge difference betwixt proverb: "Hey babe, you are my first and foremost everything and I'll be bummed if you go." And maxim: "Welp, you accepted that job in Seattle, and so I'm just gonna chug a bunch of nightshade and call information technology a life."
But that's pretty much the gist hither. Which makes this line...
God only knows what I'd be without you
...horror-movie creepy. Because the reply, manifestly, is: "I'd be a corpse!"
Ah well. We had a good run. Photo via iStock.
That'due south non dearest. That'due south codependency (to put information technology mildly). Oh, and hey! Threatening to kill yourself if your partner leaves isn't loving. Information technology's a form of emotional abuse.
Investing all your happiness and sense of self-worth in any human relationship — i that, past definition, might 1 24-hour interval end — is putting a lot of eggs in one basket. Sure, God may only know what you'd be without her, but God probably also hopes y'all have, I don't know, some hobbies. Accept a yoga class. Google some woodworking videos. Endeavor kite surfing.
"Yeah! Hell yes! What was her name once again?" Photograph past Jim Semlor/Federal Highway Administration.
One person cannot be anyone's be-all and finish-all. Information technology's too stressful. And it prevents y'all from doing y'all, which is a matter that's gotta exist washed before y'all can do anything else.
No wonder she took that job in Seattle.
ii. "Treasure," by Bruno Mars
Sure, it's a blatant rip off of every Michael Jackson song yous've e'er heard. Only, we don't have Michael Jackson anymore, and every bit tribute acts go, you lot could do a lot worse than Bruno Mars.
Look at that face. That confront! Photo by Brothers Le/Flickr.
Here's why the song sounds romantic:
Treasure, that is what you are
Honey, you're my gilded star
You know yous can make my wish come true
If you lot allow me treasure yous
If you let me treasure you
Laissez passer those lyrics to anyone on a used napkin at an eighth-grade make-out party and yous'll probable get an instant toll pass on the highway to tongue-town (ew).
Pass them to your spouse and, chances are, date night is going to culminate in 47 minutes of chaste-notwithstanding-passionate frenching.
Laissez passer them to a cop who pulls y'all over for running a stop sign, and they will recall you're weird — simply probably nevertheless brand out with y'all.
In fact, Bruno Mars basically has a lifetime pass to make out with America because of this song.
This is what happens when you write "Treasure" and you're on stage with Michelle Obama. Photo past Mandel Ngan/Getty Images.
And I'one thousand OK with that.
But, here'due south why "Treasure" isn't as romantic every bit it seems:
Everything about "Treasure" is retro. Everything.
Including its attitudes well-nigh gender.
"Children, have I ever told you what I shouted at your female parent on the street the beginning time we met?" Photo by Jacobsen/Getty Images.
Things outset to go south right from the very kickoff:
Requite me your, give me your, requite me your attention, baby
I gotta tell you a little something almost yourself
Ah yes. Nothing screams "respect" quite like a man lecturing a strange woman on the street nigh something she "doesn't know about herself."
What could information technology be? Could it be that her jokes are funny? Could information technology be that she's got something in her teeth? Could information technology be that her nonfiction book about early modern German language history is extremely detailed and informative?
"Thanks for teaching me all virtually Martin Luther's bible!" Photo by Torsten Schleese/Wikimedia Commons.
Spoiler Alert: It's none of those.
You lot're wonderful, flawless, ooh, you're a sexy lady
Only you walk around hither similar you wanna be someone else
Oh. It's that she's sexy. Absurd, bro. Very original.
Word of advice? Regardless of how she's walking, the lady knows she's sexy. Even if she doesn't, it really doesn't touch on her twenty-four hour period-to-twenty-four hours so much that you, a complete stranger, need to shout it at her (fifty-fifty over a funky disco snare).
So what if she does want to be someone else? I'd love to be someone else! I think being Ryan Gosling would be quite squeamish. A good way to spend a 3-twenty-four hour period weekend.
Sure, in that location'd exist an adjustment menstruum... Photo by Eamonn M. McCormack/Getty Images.
So later, of form, the narrator tin can't help himself:
Pretty girl, pretty daughter, pretty girl, you should be smiling
A daughter similar yous should never look so blue.
He respects her so much, he's actually straight-up telling her to smile! Much like Mars' character "Uptown Funk," who appears to get off on angrily exhorting girls to "hit [their] hallelujah." Which, y'all know, I guess everybody'due south got a thing.
Yes, in the world of "Treasure," a good for you relationship is an unending stream of a man complimenting a foreign adult female and said woman being so totally flattered that she immediately dispenses "the sexual practice."
He then proceeds to talk to his potential lover similar the world's creepiest pirate:
You are my treasure, you lot are my treasure
You are my treasure, aye, you lot, you lot, you, you are
You are my treasure, y'all are my treasure
You are my treasure, yep, you, y'all, you, you are
By this indicate, in his listen, she's a literal thing. An object. Which is plumbing equipment.
I suppose it could be worse, though. At to the lowest degree she'due south non only whatever affair.
GIF from "The Two Towers."
That'southward ... something, right?
3. "Don't Remember Twice, It'southward All Right," by Bob Dylan
For as long equally humans have been dating each other, humans have been breaking up with each other. And "Don't Think Twice" is a portrait of a relationship going down in flames. Glorious, poetic, acoustic flames.
Bob Dylan, a guy who is good at writing songs that a lot of people similar. Photo past William Lovelace/Getty Images.
Hither's why it sounds romantic:
Well, it ain't no use to sit and wonder why, babe
Even you don't know past now
And it ain't no use to sit down and wonder why, babe
Information technology'll never do somehow
When your rooster crows at the suspension of dawn
Look out your window, and I'll be gone
You're the reason I'g a-traveling on
But don't recall twice, it's all correct.
Boom. Strummed on out of that friends-with-benefits state of affairs like whoa.
"Don't Think Twice" is a raw vocal. An honest song. A powerful song. It's the vocal your older sister played on continuous loop for six months afterward her boyfriend left for higher. The vocal that convinced your Aunt Roslyn to go out her bank-teller job, load her four Australian shepherds into the van, and open a wind chime store in Mendocino. The vocal your friend'south cool dad always wants to play when he invited your loftier school band over to his apartment to jam.
"What timbre are you looking for?" Photograph by Sharon Ang/Pixabay.
Sure, it'south about the cease of a relationship, but it sounds romantic. And at the stop of the day, shouldn't that be enough?
Here'southward why information technology's really sooooo messed upwards:
Relationships end. For a lot of reasons. And while there is no right way to call it quits with someone, when the dust settles, both parties can certainly do good from a difficult, honest discussion about what went wrong.
It's non me, Joan. It'due south you. 100% you. Photograph by Rowland Scherman/Getty Images.
In "Don't Retrieve Twice," that word basically boils down to: "Information technology's your fault."
Permit'due south review the reasons the dude in "Don't Think Twice" is splitting with his lady friend:
I gave her my heart, just she wanted my soul
Ugh, women, right? You lot're all like, "Babe, I just have and then much unspecified love to requite," and she's like, "Take out the trash!" And you're like, "But baaaaaaabe, shouldn't my centre be enough?" And she's similar, "No, seriously. I already did the laundry, cleaned the whole house, fed the canis familiaris, did the dishes, and made both of our lunches for the week. All I need you to practice is take out the trash." And you lot're similar, "Y'all're bumming me out. I'm gonna get play guitar." And then she gets all mad! What did you exercise? Why is she trying to change you? UGH!
You could take done meliorate, but I don't mind
Yep. Yous practise heed! You lot mind! You wrote a vocal nigh it, you passive-aggressive prick.
You lot just kinda wasted my precious time
Ah aye. Your time is then precious! Call back about all the hours you wasted plumbing the ocean-deep, ecstatic mysteries of human partnership when you could have been futzing around with that home-brew kit.
Yeah, this was worth it. Photo by Nib Bradford/Flickr.
The minute y'all offset breaking it downwards, the message of "Don't Think Twice" all of a sudden starts to seem a lot less romantic. Like your sis's ex-boyfriend, who worked at the Bass Pro Shop in town for a while and at present might be in jail. Like your aunt's wind chime store, which would have closed forever ago had she not received that inheritance from her mom in the '80s. Like your friend's cool dad, who wasn't exactly, technically, paying kid back up.
"You kids want a beer? No one's under 13, right?" Photo via iStock.
Oh yeah, and the song's narrator besides signal-bare refers woman he's leaving as:
A child, I'chiliad told
That's right. In addition to beingness a run-of-the-mill passive-aggressive jerk — turns out, he'south also mayhap a pedophile.
Fifty-fifty if we are to accept that this is a metaphor and she's non actually a kid — which there's no indication it is, merely OK, Bob Dylan — the fact that Commitmentphobe Gunderson here would willingly choose an immature partner reflects fashion more than poorly on him than it does on her.
Breaking upwardly with anyone in such a cruel, dismissive way is a recipe for sticking them with years of therapy bills.
Which, I suppose, may be the signal.
4. "Leaving on a Jet Airplane," past John Denver
Who has ii thumbs and wrote a bittersweet folk vocal almost hurtling through the stratosphere in a giant aluminum tube at 600 miles per hour?
This guy. Photograph past Hughes Television set Network/Wikimedia Commons.
Hither'due south why it sounds romantic:
"Leaving on a Jet Aeroplane" is a lovely song. And impressive in its loveliness because jet planes were nonetheless kind of new at the fourth dimension it was written.
'Cause I'k leavin' on a jet plane
To a modern ear, this would be sort of like singing, "I'm a scoooting away on my hoverboooooard," but in a way that's somehow still folksy and heartbreaking and singable past 9-year-olds at summer military camp. Not like shooting fish in a barrel to exercise!
Oh babe, I hate to get
You see — he hates to go! He just hates it! We know this, considering he tells united states of america he hates it. And why would he hate to go if he didn't love his partner but that much?
Come across ya! Photo by Altair78/Wikimedia Commons.
Why indeed?
Here's why it's really not that romantic at all:
All the plaintive guitar, loping bass line, and twangy, melancholy warbling in the world can merely distract then much from the fact that the song's main character is well, kind of a jerkweed.
And in reality — surprise surprise! — information technology doesn't really seem like he hates being away all that much:
There's so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I tell you lot now, they don't mean a thing
"Babe, I promise! All the movies I watched lonely while y'all were domicile nursing the quadruplets. All the times I drained our life savings on Zoo Zillionaire. All the random sexual practice I had with other women. Totally meaningless. Certainly fun to do! Actually fun. Similar, I had a fantastic time. But residuum assured — completely empty, in an ontological sense."
"Every bit empty as this bed I just finished having sex with someone else in." Photo via iStock.
Aye, when you lot break information technology downward, "Leaving on a Jet Plane," is less of a passionate tribute to love overcoming distance and more than the deluded ramblings of a guy who needs to convince himself he's "proficient" despite all evidence to the contrary.
And for all he claims to exist cleaved upwards about having to part from his 1 and only, the dude seems pretty excited nigh the flight. Oh, y'all're leaving on a jet aeroplane, are you lot? Are y'all Zone 1? Gonna humblebrag on Twitter almost the "terrible" Cibo express salad yous were forced to choke downwards as you sat waiting to embark on your fun, mysterious hazard?
"Life so hard @ LGA #missingmybabe." Photo by Gesalbte/Wikimedia Eatables.
He continues:
Ev'ry identify I become, I'll think of you
Ev'ry song I sing, I'll sing for you
Ah absurd. He'll call up about her while strumming and making "my dearest is delicate as the morning dew" eyes at a waif-y grad student in the front row. That pretty much makes up for it all.
Then he demands:
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
After all the betrayal and heartbreak, after basically revealing himself to be a grade-A sleaze who tin't be trusted, he still has the gall to tell her to wait? To wait for him?
And here's the kicker:
When I come back, I'll bring your wedding ring
Ah yep. He'll put a ring on it. Finally.
"Ehhhhhhh...." Photo via iStock.
Dissimilar all the previous trips, where he'southward cheated a billion times, drained the family unit depository financial institution account, and only been a full general screwup and disappointment.
Just yeah. This time he says he'll bring back a nuptials ring.
I promise she joins a polyamorous octad and never looks back.
5. "When a Homo Loves a Woman," Percy Sledge
When yous expect upwardly "soul" in the lexicon, the book plays you a recording of this song.
Percy Sledge, having a few thoughts. Photo by Gene Pugh/Flickr.
Specifically, information technology plays you the very start line.
Here's why it audio very romantic:
When a human loves a woman
Sure, you can write the lyrics downwards, but it doesn't even come close to capturing the heartache. The yearning. The delicious, delicious pain-belting:
WHEN A Human LOVES A Adult female
Closer ... but nevertheless no.
WHEN A MAAAAAAAN. LOVES A WOOOMAN!
Yes! Sing it, Percy Sledge!
Information technology'due south an elemental lyric.
Information technology's a heart-shattering lyric.
It'southward a lyric that demands you put your dorsum into it.
It's perfection.
Equally long as you don't keep listening.
Hither's why the song is actually pretty horrifying:
From the opening lines of "When a Man Loves a Woman," nosotros know that, at least on occasion, a man loves a adult female.
Which raises the question: What happens when said man loves said woman?
He'd give upwards all his comforts
And slumber out in the rain
If she said that's the mode
It ought to be.
Whoa! OK. No. Back up. A human, no thing how devoted, no thing how selfless, no thing how in dear, needs shelter. Otherwise, a man will die of exposure and hypothermia.
Plow his back on his all-time friend if he put her downwardly.
No! Jeez. No. A man can't put up with that kind of isolating behavior. A man needs friends! Once a man's whole support system erodes out from under him, a man will be biting, ungrounded, and lonely. And a man's mental health will deteriorate.
I gave yous everything I take
Tryin' to hold on to your heartless dearest
Baby, please don't treat me bad.
This is not what happens "when a human loves a woman." It'due south what happens when a man loves a decision-making, manipulative woman. An abusive woman. A woman who, in truth, only loves a adult female. Herself.
"Information technology's Chris or me." Photo by geralt/Pixabay.
And that's not good for you.
Run, Percy Sledge, run! Nosotros're hither for you.
(Side note: Lest it get implied, there is mode more than one way for a man to love a woman. Mayhap they spend every waking moment cuddling and bopping each other on the nose. Perchance they slumber in separate bedrooms. Maybe they clothes up in big, costly cat costumes and refer to each other Mr. and Mrs. Kittyhawk. And when a man loves a man, I imagine it feels much the same. Or when a adult female loves a woman. Or when a gender nonconforming person loves a gender nonconforming person.)
Regardless of the depth of commitment, living situation, or combination of genders or sexual orientations, in that location'south no one-size-fits-all love solution. Every relationship is a unique snowflake. Variety is the spice of life. Necessity is the female parent of invention. In that location's more than 1 style to skin a cat. A spoonful of carbohydrate helps the medicine go down.
It doesn't matter if it's the right metaphor, as long as it's a metaphor. Photo by Rosmarie Voegtli/Flickr.
Point being: Generalize at your peril, Sledge. And please, seek help! You can do this! And if you ever find yourself in a similar situation, please give these people a phone call.
half dozen. "All I Wanna Exercise is Make Dear to You," Heart
Honestly, Center could sing a listing of the most popular AllRecipes ("Jaaaamie's Cranberry Spinach Saaaaalad/Globe's Best Lasaaaaagna/Sour Creeeeeam Cutouts") and information technology would make me desire to bark my eyes out in the arms of a tall, night stranger at the end of a pier.
This song is perfect. You should always be listening to it. If you're not listening to it at present, smack yourself in the confront and Google it. It's just that important.
I am singing the phone book. You are weeping similar a tiny infant. Photograph by FatCat125/Wikimedia Eatables.
So much passion. Then much pain. So much hair.
Here's why it sounds romantic:
Over pounding drums and a soaring melody, Heart sisters Nancy and Ann Wilson deliver a primal tribute to the one truthful romantic fantasy shared by every living existence on Earth: picking up an unnervingly attractive man for 1 night of mind-blowing sex and and then releasing him dorsum into the wild to bone — but never quite every bit compellingly ever once again.
They sing:
It was a rainy night when he came into sight
Continuing past the road, no umbrella, no coat
So I pulled up alongside and I offered him a ride
He accepted with a grinning so nosotros drove for a while
I don't have to keep because you know what happens side by side, and information technology's awesome.
"I just sit in this cabin. Counting the days since. Counting ... the ... days." Photograph by Rene Asmussen/Pexels.
Now, hither'southward why this song is not romantic at all:
The human relationship in "All I Wanna Practice" seems too good to be truthful. And it is. Because information technology's not an equally loving ,or fifty-fifty equally lusty, pairing at all.
It's a...
It's a...
Well. Y'all know what it is:
Adept at recognizing no-win situations and delicious with lemon?! Photograph by Pikawil/Flickr.
For a while, things are humming along just fine, like whatever wholesome, illicit, bearding affair should:
I didn't ask him his name, this lonely boy in the rain
Fate, tell me it's right, is this honey at outset sight?
Sure, many of u.s.a. might hesitate to pick upward a strange leather-jacket-clad man standing on the side of the route for a no-strings-attached screw, but our narrator merely has a feeling about this guy, and sometimes, you gotta go with your gut.
I can respect that.
We made magic that night
He did everything correct
Great! Seems similar it was a good determination. Bonking the hitchhiker is payin' off big fourth dimension.
But then, without warning, the song starts to sound less like an all-time great romance and more like a story men'southward rights activists tell each other every bit they vape around a campfire:
I told him "I am the flower, you are the seed
Nosotros walked in the garden, we planted a tree
Don't endeavor to discover me, delight don't yous cartel
Just live in my retention, you'll e'er be in that location"
I'm non a poet. Symbolic linguistic communication oftentimes eludes me. But unless "bloom," "seed," "garden," and "tree," suddenly mean wildly unlike things in the context of human reproduction than they have since sex was offset invented in the early-1970s, we're talking near a surprise, non-mutually-consensual pregnancy!
Hi! Photo past Avsar Aras/Wikimedia Commons.
Of form, metaphors are opaque, interpretations vary, etc., etc., etc. You lot might be tempted to retrieve, "Maybe Middle meant something else by that."
To that I say, no, they definitely meant it:
Then it happened one day
We came round the aforementioned manner
Y'all can imagine his surprise
When he saw his ain eyes
There are two possibilities here.
One: The narrator of the song is recently-deceased Jerry Orbach from this creepy New York Metropolis subway ad from nine years agone:
Photo by eyedonation.org.
Or 2: She totally conned a dude into whipping up a baby on the sly.
I said, "Delight, delight understand
Ah, sure. Yeah. No worries.
I'm in beloved with some other human being
Absurd, and then this all makes sense and is in no style the nightmarish scheme of a deranged sociopath who has at present wrecked not one but ii lives.
And what he couldn't requite me, oh, no
Was the one trivial thing that you lot tin can"
A Homo LIFE! A REAL SENTIENT HUMAN LIFE THAT IS Not INCIDENTAL TO ALL OF THIS!
The best you lot can say about that is that it's not technically illegal, and that leather-jacket man probably should have been responsible for his own birth control. Or, at the very least, asked more questions .
But ... information technology's not cute. Information technology's non romantic (fifty-fifty the Wilson sisters themselves agree).
And at the end of the twenty-four hours, the shadiest character in this song is somehow not the rain-soaked hitchhiker wandering to nowhere in the dark.
Which... is proverb something.
But at that place is a honey vocal that is truly, madly, deeply perfect. An unassailable rails in a ocean of problematic faves.
A song that does everything correct.
A song that paints a portrait of a healthy partnership built to last.
A vocal that can double as a manual for the ideal man romantic relationship.
And that song is...
"Processed Shop," by 50 Cent, featuring Olivia
Here'south why you might be — OK, near definitely are — skeptical:
l Cent (50) and that guy. You know, that guy? That guy! Photograph by Ethan Miller/Getty Images.
As catchy equally "Candy Shop" is, as fun it is to dance to, and as cathartic as it can be to scream in the middle of a crowded fraternity house at 2 a.m., in that location's no getting around the fact that the song begins like this:
I'll take you to the candy shop
I'll permit you lot lick the lollipop
I'll postal service that once more, in case y'all missed some of the dash:
I'll take you to the candy store
I'll let you lick the lollipop
Fashion to take 1 for the team, narrator of "Processed Shop"!
At commencement glance, "Candy Shop" is nobody'southward thought of a classic love song.
The lyrics are ... unusually forwards. The beat is kinda basic. The claw is similar the music they play when Abu Nazir sidles scarily by in "Homeland."
OooooOOOOoooooOOOo. GIF from "Homeland."
Information technology doesn't get played much anymore. When it does resurface, information technology feels ... kinda dated. Like watching that DVD of "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Burn" on your new Xbox 360.
It'due south not a song yous'd put on a mixtape for your crush. It's not a song yous'd play for your spouse when the kids are at dwelling with the bodyguard and y'all've got nine hours to tear up the Piscataway Hampton Inn. It'due south certainly not a song you'd include on the video photograph montage you lot made for your grandparents' silver anniversary.
It'due south simply non.
But it should be.
So hither information technology is. Here'southward why "Processed Store" by 50 Cent, featuring Olivia, is actually the perfect relationship vocal:
Yous wanna back that thing up or should I push up on it? Photo by ionasnicolae/Pixabay.
The bass drum hits. The MIDI violins whine. The singer starts filling out his fellatio permission slip. It's only been 20 seconds, and you're already getting ready to hang it up with "Candy Shop."
But then ... over the foursquare thrum and the mewling strings, a miracle occurs — in the form of a female voice joining the track, cutting through the din similar a clarion call.
She sings:
I'll accept you to the candy store (yes)
Boy, one taste of what I got (uh-huh)
I'll have you spendin' all y'all got (come on)
Keep going 'til you hit the spot, whoa
It's mutual! It's mutual! They're performing oral sex on each other!
Band the bells! Bang the drums! Release the doves!
Go, cunnilingus doves, become! Photograph by liz due west/Flickr.
fifty Cent himself may not be the world's greatest partner — for instance, co-ordinate to one of his exes, he'south done some pretty unforgivable things.
But the narrator of "Processed Shop"? He gets it:
Y'all could take it your way, how practise you want it?
Rather than but imposing his desires on the person he's with — a la the dude in "God Only Knows ("I'thousand going to invest my entire sense of self-worth in y'all!") or the street heckler in "Treasure" ("I'chiliad going to care for you like a chest full of gold doubloons!") or the sociopath in "All I Wanna Do is Brand Dearest to You," ("I'yard going to fox you into knocking me upwardly!") — the "Processed Shop" guy actually asks his partner what she wants.
Which, in the world of popular music, is practiced for nigh 50,000 trillion points.
And where are they going to practice information technology? The hotel? Back of the rental? The beach? The park?
It's whatever you're into
'Crusade consent is sexy!
I ain't finished pedagogy you lot 'bout how sprung I got ya
The narrator of "Candy Shop" is certainly ... assertive almost his desires.
But here's the fundamental thing: the lady on the receiving finish of those desires? She's conspicuously into it. And nosotros know this because she says so.
The lines of consent in "Candy Store" are vivid cerise, highlighted, and soldered into the weirdly sticky gild floor.
Meanwhile, Robin Thicke is exterior trying to convince the bouncer that his uncle is a lawyer. Photo by Grim23/Wikimedia Commons.
Girl what we do ...
And where nosotros exercise ...
The things nosotros do ...
Are but between me and yous
No thing how nasty they freak, it volition exist intimate. Information technology will be private. There volition be no revenge porn (the epilogue to "Blurred Lines," to wit, would definitely exist a protracted, emotionally devastating lawsuit).
If you exist a nympho, I'll exist a nympho
Sexual compatibility is primal to the survival of whatever human relationship, whether years, weeks, or (very perhaps in the instance of "Candy Shop") minutes long.
She may accept a high sex drive, but dude is graciously offering to accommodate her. What a admirer! These crazy kids just might go the distance later all.
And at the stop of the day, what is a relationship but ii nymphos, sharing health insurance?
Thanks, Obamacare! Photo by Wonderlane/Flickr.
Information technology's like it'south a race who could go undressed quicker
Again, everybody is having a bully time. And, critically, an equally bully time.
I bear upon the correct spot at the right fourth dimension
Of form, it wouldn't be a pop/hip-hop hit without a spot of random braggadocio, but if we're to take him at his word, "Candy Shop" guy is at to the lowest degree as expert at "doing everything right" every bit the bearding hitchhiker from "All I Wanna Practice is Make Love to You" — except without all the creepy surprise babe nonsense.
The "Candy Shop" guy is a keeper. Because he's non a hero or a stranger in the dark or a funky, shimmering dearest god. He'southward a practiced partner.
"Candy Store" is raunchy. It's muddy. It's not your grandmother'southward love song.
But when you strip away the swagger, the back beat, and the weird strings from "Best of Public Domain Middle Eastern Music 1993," by the end of the song, both people are satisfied. And at the end of the day, isn't that what a healthy human relationship is all about?
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
Photo by Francois Durand/Getty Images.
And so seductive.
Source: https://www.upworthy.com/6-songs-that-seem-romantic-but-arent-and-one-that-seems-like-it-isnt-but-is
0 Response to "Lyrics: It Will Not Chime Again"
Postar um comentário